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Ketuun 01:
Party Crashers

September 13, 2022
by meistermike

It's finally here, Campaign 2!  The campaign starts with our new heroes Myrth, Gagh, and Dan'ian exploring the summer solstice celebration in Port Townsend, and ends with our heroes in dire straights.


Brad: Hello,

Matt: friends, and welcome to another exciting adventure of the tail and told podcast today. I am not your DM. I am just another player today. Your DM is Brad.

Brad: Hello everyone. I'm very excited to DM and I think we're going to keep a bit of the mystery and let's just jump into it. So today is a sunny day in port towns and the wind is strong and salty coming off.

The sea of corten. Some clouds are forming far across the water, but otherwise the sky is clear. It is June 21st. The summer solstice, the beaches of port Townsend are filled with folk of all walks of life. Gathered to celebrate the occasion. Merchants have set up stalls on the grass. They serve an assortment of colorful food and drink.

You are adventures. Find yourselves among these crowds cast into the chaos. I ask you now, what has brought you here?

Mike: Well, mirth likes the party. He likes the Ravel and he likes the drink and he likes to show off just a little bit.

Matt: Um, Damion is enjoying the entertainment, so to speak. he loves when people are in vibing and carousing and they make such tempting targets, for his razor, which it's hard to pass up such ready and abundant entertainment.

Mike: You see, like

Brad: a tiny, like cloaked rag sort of situation. You don't know if there's something underneath it or not.

Mike: Um,

Brad: a hoodless broken

Matt: prop. That voice is hysterical, but

Brad: Bob said he was going to be here. So, so, um, my name is Jack.

Mike: Yeah. It won't be hard to find mirth. he's somewhat like a mix of an Acrobat and like a magician, uh, when he's showing off.

So like, you'll be jumping up on top of, like buildings and doing like par core over houses or, flipping around and doing Daredevil kind of stuff. Um, and so it won't be hard for you to find him amongst that. Plus he's going to be like shouting and probably doing all this while drinking a flag in a Vail.

Brad: Oh gosh. Okay. I guess like, while you, uh, if I can find a spot where I'm like following, imagine like you're jumping rooftop rooftop, and I'm just like looking at you and trying to follow you and figuring out where the heck I'm supposed to talk to you or get you like alone for five seconds.

Matt: Yeah. So I do say good set, man.

It's about over here on the devil. Come down here and I have a drink with me. Oh, my word. Oh, I haven't seen you and your fairy behind, too long. Come here.

Brad: Yeah.

Mike: mirth is a Seder and he cooked claps along on the, the cobblestones into the field as he leaves the town center and goes into the fairgrounds and he's like, oh, hi, Duanan nice to see you.

Matt: Okay. Oh, it's good to see you. I got this fantastic wine from this, this gentleman over here. It's got a wee bit of fizzle. And, um, I'll tell you what, I think that this is going to be a wonderful time. I don't know if you know, but, um, I get the feeling. There'll be some pretty coins to be had here today. Uh, not to mention plenty of revelers that can't hold their wine quite the way you do meth.

I ready to spread some joy.

Mike: that sounds like a plan. I have set up a three act routine to make sure everyone is nice and excited. Well, it's going to be good.

Matt: Do you need some background music? I do have, I do have my feel with me,

Mike: ah, symbols with quite a thumping beat.

Matt: He pulls out his bone white, uh, Elvin veil, which looks a little bit halfway between a violin and Viola in terms of size.

It pulls it out, grabs his bow from where it's hanging on his backpack, cracks his neck. All right. You say the word I'll start playing.

Mike: and then mirth jumps over, I guess he looks around and see what could there be? That would be like a solid, I'm looking for a solid structure. A table. Yeah, probably jump on top of a table

Brad: and I feel like a, probably like picnic bench kind of thing, like a big public park, a public park kind of by the beach.

So it's kind of a public. for the parking attached to it,

Mike: are there some like large trees?

Brad: Oh yeah. Yeah. That'd be all right. So yeah, I think you'll all be not like huge, but yeah,

Mike: you'll probably like jump up onto a tree branch. That's like around six to eight feet tall, Cedars have an unusual capacity for making pretty large jumps.

So he jumps up there, hangs from it like a monkey, like break gates across it and said, like just proclaim, stall. Hello, all. And welcome to the festival. It is nice to see you today. I am earth and this, and he like hangs from one arm. This is my friend Donovan. He is quite the Viola player. Let's everyone give him an applause.

Matt: Oh, oh you don't. Oh, thank you. Thank you. I do appreciate that.

Brad: Yeah. Have you been playing the,

Matt: I was waiting for him to announce me and then I would begin playing first of all, like a really long note. Come on. just got fiddling along to give him something to dance, to definitely

Brad: dance.

Mike: Yeah. So, and then mirth will dance, but he'll be doing it like break eating will hang from the art from the tree, rather than like, this feet will be like dangling along like a, a marionette as he's like break eating along the limit of the tree and like does a flip it down and then does some like stumbles and somersaults and then starts like grabbing some, I don't know, like apples off the table and juggling it and then like tossing them to the back to the people and stuff like

Brad: that.

Can I get a performance check from both of you, probably with advantage for each of you with advantage? Yeah.

Matt: Okay. Well, performance at the 19 plus five is a 24.

Mike: Uh, I did not quite do just as well, but I got 18. That's not bad. Right.

Brad: I'm very practiced. All right. You're yeah, you guys are getting a bit of a crowd. Um, you know, people are about like three in the afternoon. People have already had a drink or two. Um, they're definitely into it.

It's a very kind of free summer salsa. So it's a bit more nature-y folk there. lots of, kind of fake reachers. and they're, they're definitely big in the tune. And then the jig, um, Murph you feel a little gentle tug on like the Tufts of unit for, or cloak or whatever. Oh,

Mike: hello there? Little child.

How are you? Are you wanting

Brad: let's

Matt: let's move.

Brad: And I pulled back the hood to reveal a little purple cobalt. Oh,

Mike: I could not forget that. Purple scales. Did you fare? Oh, excellent.

Brad: Well look, liquor liquor. When I come to and I, kind of just wave my hand a little bit

Mike: and a shower

Brad: of sparks, comes out of my hand as I cast up prestidigitation and I will say that incorrectly at least three times

Mike: every week.

That is quite, yeah, that sounds sounds about right. Prestidigitation

Brad: there's going to be a handful of people in the crowd are also going to like see that and it's going to be kind of like a, a wave that starts. At anyone who's got prestidigitation that they can trip and a good number of these people are magic and you can find, at least for Kendra, they be like, woo.

And they're going to shoot up some sparks, kind of, this is

Matt: really helping my performance. I'm going to increase the tempo by like 10 beats per minute. It's going to go from a little

Brad: you probably get some other people, uh, dancing with that. Some people would jump in

Mike: cast, minor illusion to like, get a drum beat going on with it.

Brad: Let's give me

Mike: powers. Oh, is that or, Hmm, I thought it was something special. I saw all those ruins on the side, not an ordinary ring.

Brad: That's excellent. From multiple, from call up precious.

Mike: I was going to say that accent is very close to what I use for my goal. Um, so I would

Brad: say legally, um, I'm trying to figure out if it's more pressure, more like more like stitch or

Mike: something, and

Matt: then he it's playing. He's going to call out to the side. You know, usually sounded like a friend that I once had.

short little guy. He was very fascinated with fishes. I don't know. I haven't seen him in years, honestly. Something about mountain. Who knows? What was that man's name? Um, I'm going to purposely fail my, uh, intelligence check to remember, uh, okay.

Brad: Was it.

Mike: That sounds right. I remember rusty. He used to live in a mountain and liked to have sushi. He was very into the sushi, fresh fish Shamea

Brad: was very good

Matt: culinary genius. Although I was, was worried that eventually I get a touch his finger. He loved those knives too much. Anyways, back to the flank. Daniel stops looking at you and looks over towards the crowd and starts walking kind of towards the crowd a little into them.

And you could, he's got a nodding to people and doing his thing and moving as he goes to kind of move with the crowd, see, see what people have going on.

Brad: yeah. So as you guys are playing, can I actually get from the two of you performing? Can I get a constitution check?

Mike: Okay. Absolutely.

Brad: Constitution check a saving throat, not, not a thing that there are different check, lots of 21.

Mike: Jeez.

Matt: Too high is too high roles. What a way to start a campaign. Hey, seriously.

Brad: okay.

Mike: A reasonably high constitution for our wizard, so

Brad: good, good. that's basically just, you guys are keeping this up until, the kind of festivity start. You get a good, solid, performance. You don't, you know, you don't lose the crowd and then, they will eventually start petering off once you guys finish, the performance.

and, the ground, the crowd goes wild and then the, You'll see a Noam sets up a bit of a booth and is kind of setting up right as you're going, he starts putting on a couple of kegs. He's pulling out of his wagon, just tons and tons of alcohol, lots of, kind of obscure stuff. He's pulling out, garnishes and, all sorts of vials of things that you wouldn't really necessarily think would go into cocktails.

but he's starting to form a bit of a bar there. and people start, you know, if you've finished your set and then everyone's, applauding and they go to start lining up for these, drinks that he's got starting to form. So with the

Matt: bar, I want to ask if he has bottled drinks,

Brad: bottled drinks, um, she wouldn't have any here, like wine or anything like

Matt: that.

Brad: Oh. he would have hard liquor in bottles, but he's not really serving that to people he's using that to make cocktails. and he has kegs of ale. I mean, yeah. He would have a keg of wine, but he wouldn't have bottles of wine just available. Cool.

Matt: Let's see, Dan, you kind of look at that as soon as you realize there's nothing small enough for him to quietly swipe.

He just looks a little dejected.

Mike: Yeah. I just had an idea and I think I'm going to go with it. Mirth is a Seder. He's got horns. Um, actually, no, he's, he's more dang. I was thinking he would, he's going to unscrew one of his horns and use it as a wineglass, uh, having lost one in the past, but he's more of a, like a fond.

So his, his horns aren't quite so big.

Brad: so he's starting to kind of lay out. You can see that he's got kegs of, uh, ale, but they're not really the, the price. He can see everyone is walking away with some, more kind of fancy drinks that just really seem out of place. so these kinds of drinks would definitely fit in a smaller horn.

You wouldn't need like a big wine skin for it. so what he's serving would be closer to shot size or a couple ounces.

Matt: Daniel Daniel is going to move forward to talk to the gentlemen.

Oh, good, sir. I wouldn't suppose you have some wine underneath that table. Uh, not anything in particular against, uh, AOL, but I do prefer wine, usually most cases. Ah, you

Brad: know, I've got maybe a bottle somewhere around here. Um, uh, he's going to clink around with the glasses. Brandy new

Matt: wine. That's spent a little bit too much time around fire.

Yes. Why not from grapes, nonetheless? Um,

Brad: all right. he's going to, pour you a glass of Brandy. but he's just going to keep adding little light peppercorns and, uh, orange peels and things. He's going to take a little vile of, it looks like there's vapor inside of it. He's going to pour that on top.

It's going to kind of start clouding over the top. grind, a bit of cinnamon in there, and then he's going to hand that to you. very flourished.

Matt: Good. Well, it's not Elish and you know, honestly it doesn't even smell like Randy anymore, but you know what? It's a special hole I might as well. He's another year part me throws it back really aggressively switches it around his mouth and then tries to take a swallow for turning it over on the table.

Brad: So it's gonna, I got a couple of questions or just a couple of things. One it's it's gonna taste very smooth. He's gonna have basically with the things that he's added to it, they're pairing in a way that makes it taste like closer to wine than Brandy otherwise would he's he's added a sweetness to it.

He's, made it seem as close to like the Elvish wine that you're kind of imagining. so that's going to be a bit surprising also. How much does your character. Typically

Matt: the question is how much is normal for drinking in your settings? Um, levels of like one drink of alcohol a day on average for the average human being,

Brad: or are we talking about, well, what's the, what's the maximum your character has, like, have they gotten blackout drunk? Have they only, you know, gotten very drunk of, they typically only think one at most,

Matt: they like to get just, just ever so gently past the tipsy stage.

You're not quite to drunk. Uh, they feel in a matter of professional dignity, not to get fully drunk as a thief that's to know what you're stealing without, without forgetting what you've stolen. Right.

Mike: Sophisticated, tipsy,

Brad: and then his mirth, whereas mirth on this scale,

Mike: oh, I'm back home. keggers are like a weekly thing and getting blackout drunk is the, uh, the established norm, however, mirth ISIL, slightly bit more reserved.

he doesn't mind getting, completely sloshed and passing out, but, he, he, he will reserve that for special occasions where the rest of his people tend to just like go all out.

Brad: Okay. Um,

Matt: resistance

Brad: to alcohol. All right. So basically this is, and Mike's gotten a taste of this, I've got some special rules prepared for drinking, um, and intoxication, and I'm basically figured basically it works like a.

Exhaustion condition where there's levels. And I'm trying to figure out how many levels do your characters know? So there are six levels like exhaustion, but you guys probably, it sounds like only know, you know, three or four of them that you've encountered. So

Mike: you wouldn't, if six is dying, he wouldn't be that far,

Brad: but he was certainly taking damage, taking damage,

Matt: damaging kegger with, uh, no less than 85, proof alcohol at any time.

Um, yeah,

Brad: I think six is you, you know, might have passed out of this.

Mike: Yeah. Mirth would have, I mean that, that's probably like a once a month thing for him. Like the rebels happen, back in his, his hometown. and most people are passed out the next day. only does that like once a month on somebody's birthday or something like that.

Brad: right. Some special occasion, but you've been there. All right.

Matt: with, uh, oh, oh, you do that with a gentlemanly, uh, bearing that Dannion brings, he tries to maintain his, his, uh, gentility.

however, there is occasional times when he will just go ahead and let, let it go.

like today his anniversary and he's feeling especially lonesome since it's now been four years since he's been with his wife since he was exiled.

Brad: Okay.

So you, can you each make a constitution? Say it for me? Shove fusion nine. Oh,

Mike: uh, seven or 19. I'm rolling. Hot.

Brad: Okay. So rolling. then you are fine. You're still at zero levels. but Matt, you are starting to feel the first level. So you now have advantage on strength and charisma checks.

Matt: Good, sir. This might be the most enjoyable thing I have drank since my wedding. Could I get one in a slightly larger glass? I wish you enjoyed in more than one separate time.

Brad: Oh yeah. I just want to make sure you liked it. here you get, get back in line. I got a couple other people coming up, but then, when you come around, I'll I'll get you.

I'll get you the full one.

Matt: Are you certain, I can't encourage you to, to take pity on her, a poor exiled husband missing his wife.

Brad: He's going to look at the license

Matt: align. It's been four years since I was unfortunately kicked out of Sandra. And honestly, I've not done this. I didn't. I was my fault, but you know, for years it being my anniversary and all, it's been some time since I've talked with my wife.

I didn't miss you. So if I give you two silver, what can you give me right now?

Brad: Can you make a CRA uh, um, persuasion check now with abandoned?

Um, I just

Matt: switched days. This might be a little unfair. I rolled at 19 and my personal way Asian is plus five. That's a 24.

Brad: All right. Um, we'll switch. Yeah, he will, you know, he'll take your money. he, you know, he, he does look kind of saddened by your story and is like, man, everyone should be happy on, somersaults, so sure, sure.

I'll get, I'll get you. I'll get you a Powell one.

Mike: while he's preparing this drink, he sees this, Seder, just standing behind his bar, starting to mix drinks and just helping, like helping out just without even being invited. It just kind of looks over the one would look over and he'd be like, oh, there.

And he's, he's already serving drinks to other customers. Okay. Serving to

Brad: other people. I love it. okay. Can you make a performance check for me?

Mike: That would be yes.

Brad: do you have proficiency in, Nature or anything that might be kind of helping you here?

Mike: I have proficiency in alchemy supplies are Connor and history.

yeah, so, I mean, I figure, I mean, he's not proficient in brewers supplies, but he kind of, he has the basics, you know, being an Alchemist,

Brad: I think you had, I definitely will definitely help. so you can, you can do it with, alchemy and you can use your intelligence for it, if you're cool.

Mike: That is my best stat.

Brad: I had one.

Mike: Oh, wow. Okay. So 16 plus six. So 22.

Brad: Okay. Um, yeah, you're making drinks, you're even kind of keeping up with speed, identifying, you know, the, things that you're using, you know, might need to taste a few. They aren't really the kind of obscure some of them. but yeah, you're definitely helping out behind the bar.

He's appreciating it. He's kind of like, you know, you go Greek for like a vial and he'll kind of wince and then you're like reach for another one. He'll kind of like give you a, like a nod that,

Mike: it would take his lead and like, like follow. I mean, he, he's a studious person. He likes to learn from other people, but he also likes to just dive in and get messy.

And, uh,

Brad: so no, definitely helping out his you're picking up a few things. You know, you, you, as you do it, you can tell that like the he's keeping less and less of an eye on you and just kind of like letting you do your thing once he gives you a couple pointers and then sees that you're kind of picking, reaching for the right things.

He's like, okay. Yeah.

Mike: And then, you know, as, as people are like handing money, I'm going to use like slight of hand to just like, do like funny things, like put their ch changed, falls down from their hair or out of their hair, or like into their drinks. It just kind of. I don't know, like I flip a coin up in the air, hand them a drink, and then the coin just plans Queensland right in the drink and stuff like that.

Brad: All right.

Matt: Jasmine is quite studious, as you can imagine. Oh, this is good stuff. Oh my, I wish I'd had this for my wedding. It would been quite a, quite a sight.

Brad: He's

Matt: drinking wine, even though it's brand new. Okay. He's not slow being slow. All right.

Brad: Because it tastes like wine. then I need you to make two constitution saves.

Mike: I think the next drink that mirth makes for Daniel. And he's going to use like fire bolt to light it on fire, to burn off some of the alcohol before he, uh, you takes a drink.

Brad: Um, I got a 10 and a three. Ooh. All right. So you now are on the third level. You've got a disadvantage on constitution saving throws, but a plus four plus one before to attack melee attack rolls.

Yeah. You're getting, getting up there now. Your concepts are with this advantage. So that's kind of a haul downhill from here. And this is why

Matt: it's a good thing. My veil is indestructable by conventional means because I take it out and start playing a very sad love song to myself. Just very like, like Paganini done a little bit slower, just very aggressive and lonesome.

It's not good because my dexterity is starting to suffer. but upset now.

Mike: Yep. As you're, uh, I think as you're doing this, uh, a jet black Raven swoops down and lands on your shoulder, you probably recognize it as wit Merce familiar. And it just, it starts mocking like doing a crying, mocking sound.

Matt: Oh, I've been marked by my own way.

Mike: Being sympathetically, like weeping

nibbling at your

Brad: ear and people are in a festive mood and they are getting a bit bummed out.

I'm just going

Matt: up to random passer-by and trying to tell them my backstory at this point is I'm starting to get a little bit too social. Have I ever told you that when I was exiled from Sandra terrible, terrible story involves live. Insults name calling and unfortunately death, not mine, but yeah. So it was this one time

Brad: quietly to

Mike: some Passerbuys.

And as you're doing that birth would cast minor illusion to make the sound of a Viola playing off in the distance. Like not too far away, but like something may be challenging. And then you'd say, Hey, Don yen sounds like there's another Viola player challenging you to out a Viola off. It's like a really upbeat, uh, tune.

he's trying to like engage Danny and you make something a little bit more.

Brad: Can you make a slight of hand check?

Mike: Sure. I can do that

Brad: 2020. All right. with

Mike: my mods, they're dirty 20th. I can do a deception. I'm not as good as that. Got.

Brad: And do you have more trying to see if anyone notices that this is a spell versus your actual,

Matt: oh,

Mike: you going to let him show you up?

Matt: It's hard to be choice this time, you know, I wonder if you wouldn't mind playing like honey case something sad. kind of want to know

what do you got? Insight check. Determined if I could figure out what this is trying to help me out with. Actually, I think it's the, the little

Brad: player, sure. Yeah. You can make an insight check. Um, and then Mike, you can just kinda, you can set your intersection, you know, you can just, depending on what he rolls, he can decide if he gets it or not kind of, how hard are you trying to

Matt: the advantage?

I didn't roll disadvantage. Hang on. Yeah, that will work better than natural 20th world.

Mike: Yeah. So it, it mean it's all, it's minor illusion. I mean, it's, it's like hearing something probably. It's not, you've got live music or the music. Yeah. It's

Brad: like listening to an MP3. It's kind of a couple minutes at a time

Mike: or, uh, anyways, it's obvious that it's, it's a magical in nature. It's not like a living breathing piece of music.

Brad: Cool. All right. so are you trying to, are you still trying to play sad songs and are you trying to do that to like interact with the crowd or just this

Matt: point? Just to be sad at this point, I'm losing a tiny bit, even Bob's as much, I'm losing a little bit of my gentlemanly, demeanor and, uh, instead kind of regressed a little bit towards a guy who's lonely because he hasn't seen his wife in four

Brad: years.

You're your full wallowing. Got it.

Matt: Yeah. I'm on the verge of, uh, of a true open sorrow

Brad: at this point.

Mike: So. Perception. I mean, no, this is B he is just being so completely obvious and over. I don't think I need to make a perception. Difficult to assess. Yeah. All right. So I mean, part way through, uh, mixing a drink, mirth sees this, he kind of tosses the drink up in the air, and then just walks off and it just so happens to land down in somebody's hands, sloshes a bit.

And, he like walks over and just like picks Danny on, off the ground somewhere, points that, another nearby musician and like gestures them for something upbeat and just starts like taking Danny. And I've been doing a dance, like getting them dancing around or tries to drag them out to do it.

Brad: can you,

Matt: I'm not going to resist him, pulling me away.

Brad: I could make a persuasion

to be cheered up and that's like big,

Matt: aggressively sad.


Brad: so a there's a T flame. That's gonna kind of see that you're sad. See that you've been drinking a bit. and she's gonna watch more of her. she's going to say, you know, you get crickets, cocktails are amazing, but they are not, and not what you need when you're a sad, this, you know, that they're great for a happy time.

They're great for a party, but if you're sad, you know, you need, you need something different than. and, and, you know, I got something that might help tear you up. And you, would you be interested in that?

Do you

Matt: know anything Elvish, Anita, Anita?

Brad: you know, if we have enough of this, you might, you might hear a song from home. she's gonna pull out a, it's going to look kind of like a ginger root, but she's gonna shave off a bit of it, under a Palm and hand it to you to kind of ingest. If you'd like,

Mike: can I make I'll come meet, check, or a nature check or something to see if I recognize what this is?

Brad: Yes. Make a nature check either of you gamble.

Matt: I'm not proficient by the plus one.

Mike: 23. Um, on tonight I'm going to retire this race because it's not fair.

Brad: Daddy

Matt: is like reaching for it slowly.

Brad: Okay. So you're, you definitely believe that this is gonna, this is gonna make you happy. and Murphy, you would know that this is, you probably have experienced have seen this around. it's basically like a hallucinogenic.

It's kind of like, it's maybe a little bit stronger than weed, but not, not much. This is that kind of festival. So

Mike: it's a good recreational drug.

Brad: Good recreational drug, not any worse than, alcohol. Okay, though, can you make another nature check? Sure.


Yeah. Um, you would know that mixing this with alcohol, can be a bit more potent than otherwise having it.

Mike: All right. So as like, he's going to put it in his mouth, mirth will like tear half of it off. So they re reduce the dose, uh, and then just like pop

Brad: it into, yeah.

Matt: Well, do you do that for,

Mike: and then like, just like flick the other half into his mouth, like just like tear the half and then slap the rest of it into his face. So he doesn't hesitate and just, just sit. All right. I don't even know if you would notice, like you would do it just suddenly,

Brad: like

then can you make, a wisdom saving throw with advantage you're being helped?

17. All right. so you get, the. You know, you feel it a bit. It's definitely making you feel better. but you're not getting any negative side effects. You're not really giving any like major mechanical effects. Just the, you know, things are looking a little prettier and you're feeling a little better.


Matt: It has good ginger. So it isn't like ginger is that, does that make me feel better?

Well, you get your ginger plenty song friends.

Brad: Oh,

Matt: I haven't monetized on devil. He has seemed to be conspiring to help me recover.

Brad: Oh, I, I don't play much. or you can do anything with that other half. That's just, you know, this stuff. Isn't all that cheap. Oh

Mike: no. He, he, he, uh, he immediately put it in his mouth.

He didn't hesitate. He just like, all right.

Brad: can you also make a wisdom saving throw?

Mike: I had already rolled one. Uh, when I thought you were asking me it was 16 with advantage or not advantage, not advantage. Oh,

Brad: you miss Jake. I've gotten that one is drunk. He's missing his wife. Yeah. All right. okay, so you get with sister experiencing the other.

So you now have advantage on decks and intelligence checks.

Mike: Okay. Advantage on Dex intelligence, one

Brad: level of hallucination.

Matt: Where's your, where's your small friend. They looked like they could use some cheering up to you. You're literally behind him. He just hasn't noticed he didn't turn around.

Brad: Um,

Oh, hello? Do you need some too? Um,

Mike: he does. And you'll like, or take off a little slice and stuff it in his

Brad: mouth. Yeah. She's

Mike: on size dose.

Brad: I, I sniff it and then I lick it and then assuming nothing horrible happens. I'll eat it. Yup. Nothing horrible happens. Tastes vaguely gingery. can you make a wisdom saving throw for me working normal or advantage normal?

Oh gosh. Okay. Here we go. My first rule is a good 1 22. so then yeah, you're not feeling any effects. you're just, you know, seeing things look a little prettier,

Mike: lovely little clunkier.

Brad: she's also going up

Mike: every now and then,

Brad: so, so what bring brings y'all through here? have, are you guys all, like, would you be dressed in a way that would kind of fit in or would you be kind of visibly foreigners slash.

Matt: Dannion is visibly not from this area, because he's wearing his, leather.


Brad: is it called? Uh,

Matt: as a jerk in that look, it looks like a fancy vest was actually a set of leather armor covers his torso and he has a, a nice, but not like fancy coat. These have put on the chemist short, cloak, the hangs down.

Brad: so he,

Matt: he looks foreign. He doesn't look like, an average tourist though.

He looks like a, a general traveler.

Brad: Okay. yep. Definitely looks like he doesn't belong in this summary area. He's basically wearing, you know, like how Bruno war, like the big, in cocktail war, like the, or the big jacket poncho with the, with the hood. That's basically what I have, but it's probably fashioned out of like a format or something, a potato sack, basically.

I was trying to stick, keep out of the sun and light as much as possible.

Mike: Pretty much naked. he's got free legs. He's got a little bit of a loin. He's got a loincloth on, just kind of for the children, his, on his midsection. Cause he realizes that, you know, the people who don't live amongst the Seders like conventional people like to cover up their private parts and he's, he's like, he doesn't really understand it, but you know, he's sympathetic.

but he has like a long scarf. it's kind of, it goes around his neck and then goes down to his knees about, and it's kind of a, almost a, um, Like a Mayan kind of yellows and reds and greens, in like this, uh, the patterns and stuff that are there. So, yeah.

Brad: Yeah. And I feel like I'm so on the same page, this is such a mirth party.

Um, so you guys will notice that especially the, you know, the furrier races, the ones with, pairs and coats, they have in particular kind of shed all of their clothing and, or a lot of them are swimming. There are some other people just skinny to be in the water. but particularly the, the furrier types are embracing the natural, celebration that you guys are at.

There's definitely no flowers in people's hair and oh yeah, Mark's

Mike: going to go streaking later for sure.

Brad: integrations are reduced the part of the celebration about, it feels

Matt: as a sighted need for catharsis is gonna start glancing around trying to figure out if there's a wrestling area or some other form or some other sort of physical activity around.

He's not doing a particularly good job of it since he's

Brad: a little, a little tipsy at this point. you know, people are pretty laid back here. They are enjoying the sun. I think there's, there's no real sign of physical altercation or, kind of macho ness. You kind of get the vibe that that would be frowned upon in these circles.

Mike: If Dannon was like looking for this visit or talking about it, visibly mirth would the first one kind of would be open to it. He's, he's up for a challenge. He likes, he likes to get into trouble, and doesn't really care what other people think. But I think he would offer it more as like a, like a wrestling match, like no weapons, just kind of like tumbling in the dirt.

Brad: All right.

Matt: I just consider that a form of, uh, aggressive hugging.

Brad: Um, probably not quite, not Sumo. Right.

Mike: Well, I mean, if they're super drunk and they're just kind of like, just like, there's probably a competition much like Sumo wrestling with where there's a circle and they've got horns. Right. So they just like Ram each other, uh, when they're really drunk, but like no one ever hits, they just kind of like, cause they're so drunk, they just like are like running towards each other, but then like just fall out of the circle.

And it's really like, who's the last person to fall out. Not because they were like attacking each other, but because they're so drunk, they're just trying to stay inside, balancing on a beam or something like that.

Brad: Okay. So if you look around a bit, you will see some kind of tougher looking folk. think you probably see a handful of dwarves that are looking a bit more rowdy. they're kind of yelling, at each other more talking real loud, and they, they seem to you like, they might be persuaded into a friendly, alternative.

Matt: I'm going good.

Fight the jaws. I need to get my system. I need to get my mind focused and mirth, you know, the best way to get my mind focus was it was a good brawl, a little, little, a little TLC for the old ill melon up top. You know what I mean? Um, do me a favor. Don't let me hurt anyone too badly. Okay. If the blade comes out, stop me.

I don't want to kill anyone. And when I get started, you know, me, once I get going, sometimes it's hard to stop.

Mike: Oh, why don't you just give me your blade then preemptively.

Matt: Okay. I can't keep it

Brad: mirth. Can you make a history check? Sure.

Mike: I am actually really good at history, but I rolled really bad. So I got called it ends up being a

Brad: 10 and by being as well,

Mike: I get advantage on your intelligence checks.

Don't I?

Brad: Oh, that was,

Mike: uh, that was actually the same. Nope, 12 it's 12 this time.

Brad: Okay. The six

Matt: drunk history, ladies and gentlemen. So

Brad: you would, you would know enough that dwarves and elves are pretty at odds historically. you know, that that cliched definitely holds true in this setting. even though

Matt: Daniel is a human just wearing Elvish clothing.

Brad: Yeah. They, they would, that is to remind me of, so you're human. I wish clothing. Okay. good. So they're going to try to kill you. That's good.

Matt: All right. They must be offended by my existence, but not killing

Brad: me out. Yeah. So they, they would, they would see your affiliation. And that would peak their eye.

They'd see that you're not an elf, so they wouldn't be like too disgusted about you. but they would see that you're kind of affiliated with them. and that would definitely get them excited about this, this bra they might otherwise just kind of laugh you off, like, all right. Uh, you know, I could, I could go for a tussle.

This party was getting a bit boring for us anyways. Don't you think?

Matt: Uh, my good dwarven says I am and silver leaf of the Sindar and send reliefs at your disposal. I'm in need of a bout of fisticuffs if you would. And I would like to wonder if you would like to, um, do you engage in a tiny bit of catharsis with me

Brad: using large words? Yeah. so, so what standard rules?

Matt: I don't know. It drove and standard rules up short.

Brad: No, no weapons ale between rounds and, first one down, down.

Matt: Could I have Brandy and state matter of principle? Don't drink a L don't like me.

Brad: They're going to look at you. Like something's up like, oh, fine.

I'll drink. So, all right. Going to take out

Matt: his two daggers. Yeah, though. Um, but take his crossbow off from where it's hanging just underneath

Brad: his club. It's pretty warm there. They're going to take off there. I'm like all their top. They're going to take off their shirt, their, um, coats and things. do you get the, do you get the sense that you don't have to like fully undress, but you can, you know, straps and things on your outside might not help you in this, in this game,

Matt: Daniel would lose his outer cloak, but keep his Gerkin.

He might take off the shirt underneath it, just skill, extra

Brad: mobility, but that's also just not

Matt: trust his

Brad: own durability. Yeah. Um, also just FYI, I don't really follow the, I kind of assume that even if you don't have your armor on, you still have the same armor class, unless it's like plate, just FYI.

We'll keep his jacket on. Yeah. he's looking at these doors

Matt: in their arms and going as it's going to hut. Good.

Brad: All

Matt: right. are we doing, these are doing the D four divided by two rule, or we're doing the, a flat one point of damage plus modifier. What

Brad: are we doing? So strength. you mean for the, damage, the alcohol rules, the attacking brawling, the bra, I mean, it's going to be unarmed strikes, which is, I believe just like one hit one, plus your strength.

Yeah. Plus your strength. Um, this is going to be, so it'll, it'll just see one hit point plus your strength. Um, there might be some other things, you know, going on, but because it's going to be like wrestling and stuff too, it'll be a bit more grappling focus. Um, Ooh, fun. So, but first they're going to see that you are visibly more drunk than the other guy.

So they're going to let you pass on the first round of ale and he's gonna throw back some ale. let me make a roll.

Matt: Um, well please keep my cane. I don't want to lose it. You know what I mean? I purposely handed to him a shaft first.

Mike: All right. He takes it and then like, he's got this huge pile of like weapons and stuff and he just throws them on the ground. Clink, clink, clink, clink, clink, clink. And then he's like, he's paying attention to the fight

Brad: who says go.

Mike: you'll see that it says go.

Brad: Um, can you roll initiative? Ouch.

Matt: That's a, that's a nine

Brad: drunkenness is happening. do you have a good decks? My dexterity is 18. I mean is nine with your dexterity nine with my

Matt: issues modifier.

Brad: All right. so he's going to go first. He's going to hear the go and you're going to feel his eyes light up, like he's ready for it.

and he is gonna kind charge you and he's probably, he's gonna try to punch you in the gut.

Ooh, uh, natural too. So that's just not going to hit, probably not. So you'll still kind of swing wide enough for him to there'll be able to react fast enough for that.

Matt: I'm drunk. I'm not stupid. Let's see, I'm coming. Just kinda step to the side. He is actually a lot shorter than me. I have a little bit mobility on them.

Brad: Yeah.

Matt: just use the fact that I have height to my advantage and try and Niamh in the face.

A little dirty. I know. so I have a plus one D four to attack bonuses in some kind of an embryo. You do. Okay. Is this what strength

Brad: did it do? Do do

Matt: okay. 18 plus floors at 22.

Brad: That'll hit and put that dice

Matt: aside for a moment. Okay. And so the thing is it's one point of damage by having negative one to strength.

So as I said to be a flat one, or am I going to actually deal zero damage? No,

Brad: the minimum one. Okay.

Matt: It's a zero. And I'm like, oh

Brad: no, no, that'll be a, that'll be one head point. for dwarf, barely flinches. He slapped

Mike: me in the face. Plop read. Well,

Brad: yeah. All right, then he's going to, he's gonna kinda grapple you. and so it's going to make you make a strength check. He has a natural 20

Matt: could I attempt to evade with acrobatics?

Brad: Oh, yeah. Um, you can do, you can try that. All right. I'll

Matt: keep my original role. So then it's a seven plus six. You still won't make it, but for RPM reasons, I wanted to say, I got a

Brad: third. You almost, you almost please aloud. Um, but he, what does natural 20, he's gonna pick you up.

and you know, you're, you're really kind of thrown off because he is so much shorter than you. but he kind of hits you. Yeah. and he's gonna pick you up and throw you to the ground. so you're gonna be prone and he's going to do three hit, three damage to you, His, his bodies are gonna cheer. oh yeah, you're good. I'm gone together. Gronk.

He's going to kind of back up a bit too, and kind of like, let you stand up and kind of bask in his glory of it.

Matt: As I go to stand up, I'm going to grab a fistful of

Brad: dirt, stand up, say,

Matt: God, how do you do blind? I'm going to Chuck the dirt into

Brad: his face. All right. how would you advocate that then to have him make a deck save?

he is not going to make it, so you're going to have advantage, um, um, attacks for a little bit.

Matt: All right. And while he's blinded, I'm just gonna step two steps to the right. Hoping that he'll charge where I used to be and get off his. So he whiffs past me.

Brad: Okay. I like it. can you make a stealth roll?

Matt: So if he hears me, yeah. Oh, I'm so inebriated right now. That's a nine.

Brad: All right. So he's give me a deception check for me.

Matt: A deception check. Yes, sir. Coming right up

Brad: 12. 15. Okay. so he is going to kind of charge where you were. and he is gonna swing at you. but he's not really like on the right. Mark is kind of like, you know, the square next to you and he kind of throws out an arm to like grab you, but it's just going to kind of punch at you.

Okay. She's still gonna hit. okay, so that'll be another, uh, three HP.

Matt: Okay.

Brad: And you know, you're now bloodied, so you could say that. Yeah. Um, they're gonna, I got a bruise growing. It's really good. Yeah. One of the, um, one of the dwarves is going to call out. All right. And around one. and the, and the, uh, the work you're fighting is going to step back. Um, and they're going to hand both of you, big pints of ale.

Matt: Is this where I get to use my one hit dice?

Brad: you know sure. I'll let, I'll let you take a hit that.

Matt: Oh yes. I rolled the eight. Okay.

Mike: So how much did, how much damage did you get to this door?

Brad: I only hit him once you hit him. Once I hit him, once

Matt: I said to

Brad: try it, stunned him. Yeah. For one, one. Okay. Because

Matt: I'm a, cause I, cause thing is I have little strength and since I'm inebriated, I also don't have the greatest wisdom in the world.

Brad: he should have thought over the fact that their horse he's making a medicine check. he rolled a natural 18, so he's going to lose the effects of the, sand. He's going to rubbing his eyes sufficiently. can you make a constitution safe still with disadvantage

Matt: still disadvantage

Brad: six.

Okay. So you get another level of intoxicated.

Matt: Dang. So I'm charmed by wondering more nearby creatures.

Brad: So you, you are who

you are now charmed by him.

Matt: So do we have to fight? I mean, no, I think about it. You're quite a lovely person. I almost said human being, but you know, she wouldn't love the person and I'd hate to ruin, ruin that wonderful face. You know? I think we, I think we could be friends.

Brad: Can you make a perception or a perspiration check?

I believe still with advantage. 13, um, there popcorn being served anywhere.

Yeah, there'd be, um, there's some street vendors. They've got a talker and they've got caramel corn. They've got, a couple of other colors of, your candy, candy.

They've got all sorts of colors of popcorns. So pick your favorite color. So you see like just a purple clawed hand put like two silver on higher. I'm assuming it's higher than he is because he's only two feet eight. And so he's going to put the like coins on there and then just grab a bag and pull it off.

Okay. Is there a color you want in particular?


Matt: it's very spring term. Have we gathered any sort of crowd at this point?

Brad: yeah, the, you know, it's again, not everyone's cup of tea here. you've got some people definitely keeping an eye. but you're not like, you know, you don't have crowd cheering for anyone in particular. Just kinda, there, you're also getting a couple of, looks like a couple of some people who would like it to quiet down, move along.

people are,

yeah, just there, there are a couple of people who are kind of regretting sitting this close to the doors.

and what that person check that is enough for the dwarves like, oh, you're all right, mate. Uh, good, good fight. And you know, I got you pretty good with some of those.

Matt: Oh. So I wake up in the morning, having a great is going to be pretty. That's what? Come here, you come in, you need a hug. Come in. Don't you run, come back.

Um, I will find you, you can't oh, you're a fast it'll do don't shoot.

Brad: yeah, I mean it's direction had kind of picked you, you just kind of slumping down with the doors for a bit. They're gonna kind of go back like, it's cute. Cause they're like these kind of tougher looking dorms, but they're still like have a full picnic blanket with like a spread of cheese and I've got a platter it's they're definitely still here to just enjoy the sun.

Matt: About my punishment. So my wife, Brian, she's really the central focus of this story. And consequently, why

Brad: I'm

Mike: dragging him away.

I think they've heard enough about

Brad: this is a good

Matt: story

as worth drag to be away. trying to resist a little bit, however, given how knee rated I am, and also the welts that are forming on my body, I get the feeling I'm not going to resist very effectively.

Like just effectively dragging me, but

Brad: slowly, I think as also as you get, as you get farther away from the dwarves, your charm does just change to Murph or now you're just, you know, you're always thinking it was

Matt: trying to keep me from getting killed. Appreciate it. I mean, I mean, you got those horns, but I swear you're a beautiful, beautiful creature.

I don't care if you look like a goat it's I mean, you've got a charm, maybe a bit Bon yacht, but you get a charm and you bring such interesting friends. I never thought I'd meet a miniature dragon born before. I mean, I didn't know. They came in miniatures, you know, mother Wolf was, that's just an interesting fluke.

If you look at

Pardon me, my man has seemed to suffer when I drink, you know, give me a moment and he runs over to the water without getting his clothes and just falls face first, the water for a second stands up, shakes off. Okay. I'm feeling better. Okay. Where's my, where's my cane

Brad: lashing.

Mike: Just lying on the ground somewhere,

Matt: I think is Elvin Meg.

It's beautiful. Why are you even in the dirt fix it? Uh, I was, I was belly flopping into it.

Brad: splashing in the water. Can you make a constitution that does, if you're successful, you'll lose a level of drunkenness, as a 13. yeah, so you, you drop back down, you've lost. You're kind of getting charmed by whoever's nearby, um,

Matt: meth.

This cane is not cystic. First of all, it was crafted on the finest Elvin Smith's second of all, he reaches down. It's going to take the curved bit of the cane that he has, where it's going to curve into this kind of interesting Eagle in flight motif. Is that for the wings aren't out there tucked, you gotta take it, snap it down and pull out just three or four inches of the blade hidden inside of it.

In case you forgot, this is not a stick, click snap back into its concealed, form. He starts putting his daggers away and

Brad: yeah,

Mike: it's a fancy stick.

He picks up the stick on the ground. Yeah. like just scrapes off the, like the branches and walks around, like he's being fancy, like Daniella is with his stick,

doing a little, like a caricature of him to want to do, to, to do,

Brad: how old

Mike: me I've got a fantastic, mirth is I thought that he was going to be like 16, but

Jacob: because there's drinking in this campaign, I decided to up that to 21. Um, yeah, isn't isn't yeah. Like eight. Yeah. Yeah.

Matt: But like for a cobalt, I think that's about cobalt.

Jacob: Cobalt started drinking it like to,

Matt: this campaign Damion is like the college senior that's seen so much and mirth is like the freshmen. That is way too chipper in the morning.

Jacob: Yeah. Something like that. But I mean, for Cedar's like, he's still, he's a baby. I mean, the Seders are fake creatures. They theoretically can be a mortal or, uh, or very long lives.

So, yeah. Uh, he's still like a teenager, right. In relative terms

he's a twin.

All right. So about this time you guys are going to notice two things. You're going to notice having kind of walked a bit down the beach. And up with these doors, you're going to notice a cavern, kind of in the, so there's the ocean, the sand, the grassy area, and then a bit past that there's kind of a sheer cliff wall.

and you're going to notice the kind of crack in that, um, in a small stream coming out of that crack, going into the water. Now that you're down this far, you're also going to notice in the water. you're going to hear some horns going in. You're going to see, some sailboats lining up and, you're going to kind of gather that they're getting ready for us for a race.

and you're going to hear a bit kind of back toward where you work. someone calling out, place your bets placed in bad's racist Baton to start.

So some someone is kind of collecting, wagers on the sailboat race.

Matt: Where is he?

Jacob: He's Kind of back toward the trees. And then it's kind of a long skinny beach, and park along the beach.

So people have spread out a bit and

it'd be a bit of a walk, but, you know, does that mean you

Matt: can do one

Jacob: All right. birth doesn't really want to place bets, but caverns are always interesting.

Matt: Dannon's first instinct is to go and screw with the rays, but he's also leaning a little heavily on his cane at the moment, and doesn't really want to go too far from birth. This is going to take two steps, turn around. Well, where are we going to go and cost a bit of entertainment at the race, or are we going, what are you doing?

Come on let's you can go over here and, and, and cause trouble.

Jacob: I don't know if you know this, but Seders don't really like to get into the water at least further than, uh, you know, waist deep that it's unnatural to, to be floating on it. It's, it's really strange. we do like leisurely, floats down the river, or in a lake, but, the open sea is a little bit open.

just so looking at the map. As well, you can see, or you would kind of know that the, the water is relatively protected here. you know, the waves can get choppy, but you're pretty inland from like open ocean. Um, okay. And there's a little Cove or something going on here, right? Yeah. It's kind of, um, kind of off of Mexico as Harbor.

Uh, I don't know. Uh, what does GHAC want to do? He's been like tagging along quietly. I mean, this, this is not, this, isn't our cup of tea. He's still kind of shy about so far.

Matt: My friend. Why are you wearing that hood? It's a glorious day. That's the whole

Jacob: point, uh, mirth. It's going to hoist him up onto his shoulders and start like carrying them like a kid.

Oh, are

Matt: you, I'm sorry. Were you partying the night before? And you're feeling a bit light-sensitive perhaps you'd better go into yonder, Kevin and a rest of your eyes a bit. I'd hate for you to feel the effects the sun after enjoying too much in mirth. Hmm.

Jacob: Never have too much mirth.

What about a frankincense?

That's fine.

Matt: Oh, I'd love it. Where'd you find this one

Jacob: in a bar? Just like everyone else I meet.

Matt: That's true.

Jacob: All right. So if you guys are approaching the cave, you know, it's going to look pretty natural. It's just a, kind of a small crack in the rock. small stream coming out. as you get closer, you might hear a little bit of kind of cackling. Can I get a perception check from particularly a gig?


okay. Perception. It's not my favorite thing. am I in the sunlight right now? no, you, if you were doing this, you'd be peaking your head into that cave cave. Gotcha.

a seven. Okay. Um, not, not quite the roles we had before. All right. Yeah. So you hear a bit of kind of like cooking, you don't hear it like anything particularly, recognizable, and with the, the waves and the kind of blaring of the horns, you don't hear much more than that. Cool. To me,

Matt: uh, to be perfectly honest, I'd like a little shed myself.

let's go sit down and watch the race. Enjoy a little shade. Probably a nice little bit cooler.

Sorry. It's I'm pretty sure I'm getting a headache from whatever ginger that guy gave me.

Jacob: Ginger.

Matt: Yes.


Jacob: Remember I with my concept? Yeah. Yeah.

is the water, fresh water or is it a brackish water, strange, fresh water, right. You grabs a handful of water, and takes a sip out of what, you know, a safer looking little, Cove or I guess fast moving water is what you want to drink. You don't want to drink still water. So he drank, he just like scoops his hand out of, uh, running water.

It gives it a sniff. Was that a lick and then, takes a drink before, before you drink it upon sniffing it. you, you would smell that the martyrs carrying kind of, some like biological kind of, it's not, not

Matt: slightly like essence of privy.

Jacob: Can you make a nature check? Not, not that so much. Oh, that one plus four.

So five shouldn't be drinking Meredith. Um, so we would recognize it's kind of sour to get an advantage on that, but this one. All right. Sour. All right. Uh, let go. This does not look like drinking water. don't know if you should be doing this. It's not good drinking water. what does yak typically. Chuck loves beat, but, but you know, whatever, whatever has masters, give him look on his own now. So Kirk just gets food. So cause you've been kind of living in dwarven society for a bit. Right. Is that what you said?

So mostly, mostly I would say meats and ales. Okay. So you might recognize from your days, back with your kind, this is closer to rotting, meat, meat that hasn't been stored very well and just kind of left out. this is kind of that smell that, this is this smell of death and, um, the , for how to sometimes dispose of or food.

maybe there is a dead animal in the cave ordered rotting fish. I'm not as not to rotten,

Matt: you know, Steve would have loved this

Steve sake. I've got to know if it's fish or foul. if I approach the cave, is there a

Jacob: smell? know, now that it's been pointed out, he might smell a bit of sourness. but certainly, you know, it's not like the. Smell, you're getting, you're getting other kind of cave, damp, moist, kind of full like the question.

Matt: Feel free to say, I, I, you don't know whether it, which is which, but is this more of a, a tangy sourness in the air, more of an accurate sourness in the air?

Jacob: This would be more Akron.

Matt: Okay. I knew you were in engineer's, you know, the difference.

Jacob: mostly my dad does crossword, so I know

Matt: the courtesy.

Fantastic. uh, gentlemen, I'm not certain, but I do believe that this might be not just biological, but potentially minorly and industrial. Is there a meat processing center around here someplace where they slaughter the cows and dispose of the innards? perhaps some sort of tannery nearby is there.

And I would know of a

Jacob: Tanner. I don't think any of you guys would have any idea. Cool. You're kind of on the outskirts of town. Um, so

Matt: like when they take a creature, rip his skin off and then turn it into something useful, they have to feed it through certain chemicals that make it pliable.

Jacob: you would only know that generally tanneries are on the outskirts of town.

They're normally not placed very nearby. so it would be consistent with where a tannery would be if there was one. but you guys wouldn't know of any tanneries near here.

Well, if there's something dead in there, we probably should clear it out. You don't want it contaminating the water. I'll burn it up with some flames. I love

Matt: little drug. And you did say

Jacob: they love some fire and you'll like, shoot off some fire bolts.

Matt: I advance Canaan hand.

Jacob: All right. so it's going to stay pretty, um, skinny, maybe 10 feet across, five feet of that being, or maybe even only like three feet of that being admirable I Creek. and it's going to continue like that for, you know, maybe 60 feet. and then how do you guys, who's got dark vision.

Someone's got dark vision who has got, I think he might be the only one of our group with dark vision. I was born in the darkness. He's a black, so I, I know the light and rules in D and D can be a little funny.

Matt: there's the way of dim light. And then there's the idea of true

Jacob: darkness, right. So the way I'm going to do it, because I think people do it differently, is it's more, it's more dependent on what you're looking at versus where you are.

So if you're in complete darkness, but what you're looking at, even if it's like a hundred feet away is in bright light, you'll be able to see it just fine. Um, cause that feels like. but

Matt: all right, so I'll light a quick torch since I carry a few on me, even when I go carousing. Cause you never know when you have to walk home in the dark, a light, a quick torch it, hold it up above my head.

So it's not to hurt anyone's eyes.

Jacob: I think he's only, gives this advantage in sunlight. Not just light. I wouldn't

Matt: know

Jacob: that. Yeah. I only I'm. I'm good in the darkness in capes. yeah, you might see us and kind of light up and finally getting to know that his eyes get like wide and he's like, I can see again, visibly relaxed.

Yeah. Yeah. I'm wincing. All right. So as you're approaching, you're gonna see following, you're going to see a fork and you're going to see following the water one way. you can faintly see, some lights at the end of the tunnel, or more it kind of bends and you can see the lights kind of bouncing off the wall.

and then to the side, you can hear a faint like buzzing and then it stops. And every occasionally if you listen for it, if they're a little,

kind of occasional buzzing,

that sounds very unusual for a cave. What makes that sound?

Matt: I don't know, but I didn't like it. Daniel is going to. Pull his hood up over his head and try and toss his torch into the water

Jacob: and go stealth is going to douse this torch and go

Matt: stealth and use the existing light up ahead to guide him to forward.

Jacob: Okay. Toward the, toward the lit area. Okay. Yeah. cause the buzzing is,

Matt: yeah, that is a 25 for south. Alright,

Jacob: good to know that is still the,

Matt: I just, what I

Jacob: need to be. Are the others following? Are you letting them scout ahead? A little bit of both, but like trailing I'll be able to like join if needed. Okay.

Versus going to upload his, uh, his, rod. He's got a rod, uh, and there's going to be lots of rod jokes. I'm sure. Tell us about it. Tell us about your rod. This rod is actually, rote, which is the adjuster stick. It he's, he's fashioned a little like facsimile of himself, and like screwed it onto the top of his magic wand essentially.

Uh, uh, it's this arcane focus with a little like bobblehead on it. and he's gonna like wave it around in front of the

pool and then grab a dagger in his other hand. Okay. You have to have protection when you're holding your rod.

Anyways, go ahead.


Matt: Pick up our game. Um, what would it be? Game of chaos.

Jacob: Yeah. all right, so dainian, that's your house pronounce, right? Daniel Damion. Daniel. So Daniel is approaching, and you're going to see, once you go around this corner, the kind of crack that you've been following widens into a pretty large cavern, kind of an underground canyon, is formed here.

and you're going to see built into the sides of this canyon, kind of all the way up are these rickety looking platforms, made out of wood, kind of attached. There's the occasional bridge spanning between the platforms, they're cables hanging down and you can see that, ropes with buckets and platforms are being used to kind of traverse things up and down, um, in between the levels to kind of navigate.

And it's kind of a small city that's built into the sides of this. And can I get a perception check from you with disadvantage? Cause everything's pretty dim. Even the light that you're seeing is pretty dim up there.

Matt: That is a 12.

Jacob: All right.

Matt: what been 22?

Jacob: Yeah. So you can, you can see. Yeah. Um, you can see that, there, there is some kinda creatures moving around. can't quite make out what they are. and can you make a normal perception check? This will be with, for hearing

Matt: the 13.

Jacob: Okay. Um, so you can hear that this is where the kind of clicking and chattering is coming from. there's a, uh, but that's

Matt: about, does it sound as if it's mechanical, clicking and chattering or was it spoken, cooking? No, it

Jacob: sounds like a spoken kind of, kind of language or intelligent. You hear kind of occasionally coming, like grandson, like it you'll, you'll pick up some common, and they catch them like, Hey, or you'll catch some curse words in common, as well, well, I don't over my shoulder.

Matt: It looks like there's some sort of Kevin, I can't quite make something up, but while we drag it in front, which you mind coming up. Eyesight in this environment.

Jacob: Um, but why I do it is I kind of like climb over onto his shoulders and have him like, poke poke me over around the side. Okay. Uh, of course mirth is going to take the low spot.

So it's going to be a three tiered heads poking over the ground.

Matt: Um, and then

Jacob: you guys are at the bottom of this is going to be considered complete darkness, where the, like, it's lit up a bit on top, um, on these platforms, but it's complete darkness kind of where you guys are. so can I get a perception check from GIC, with disadvantage, even though I have darker skin and stuff.

Right. Cause it's complete darkness. You get disadvantage as a fewer dim light. Yeah. Oh, one of those was the Nat 20 with the other one, almost a two. So before. Okay, perfect. I mean, yeah, it was, I mean, it was perfect. And then a good point and then the other one wasn't okay, so you're now, you're now at the base of this.

What are you guys doing upon seeing this, kind of city built into the walls, hearing these somewhat aggressive noises coming from the top. But

Matt: since I can't see anything, I assume the worst and grab my crossbow, being a, being a rogue, being a professional, whenever I don't feel comfortable, I already a weapon just in case.

So I take my crossbow out kinda quietly, try to put a bolt on there and have it ready.

Jacob: Does the opposite. He puts his dagger away. He's like, oh, it's a city down here. hello? Hello up there. Are you guys not joining the party? can I may have a little bit of that ginger root left. If you like some, can I get a perception check from everyone?

Yes. I'm going

Matt: to kill you. How he taught us if I told you not everyone's your friend, but

Jacob: it's a city right next to another city in the middle of a party. It's let me, what's the worst that's going to happen. It's probably somebody's home. You don't want to be walking up there pointing the crossbow a 1910, the loudest person sees the most, well, I mean, he's right up front.

Like he's not hiding or obscured behind anything. It's just like walking out. Hello. Attempting to stay

Matt: stealthy while he's walking forward for the record.

Jacob: can everyone roll initiative?

Yes. I can

Matt: Alright. Uh, this time we got much better initiative of 22,

Jacob: like in a 2112, I got a rug.

G a G H

Matt: got it. The clinging doc pronounced differently.

Jacob: Yeah.

So you guys are all surprised on this, so can you even me with my 19 or whatever it was? Um, yeah, I w I was doing that as their, um, their stuff. They tied, you want to 19, I should stop using the stack itself.

Matt: Well, at this point, we might as well keep our loaded dice out. If

Jacob: everyone's got one you guys have been walking um, coming down.

well, I mean, do you guys kind of have the water backwards? You guys are, you guys are going up, you're going up. Um, okay. How are the hallway going that way?

it's opened up. So the it's kind of forming a bit of a triangle here. Um, going back to the tunnel you came out of is probably back here at this point, and was 10 feet, wide. So you guys Damian's turn, when do you guys get your reactions back on surprise. They get a full turn and then we get our turn.

We don't get any reactions turn, right? Yeah. Um, okay. So monsters first, they are going to fire a arrow at each of you guys. that is a 19 to hit deck, for,

for damage

is a that won't hit. Um, they won't hit Damien and then from there is a

17 to hit. Yes. That'll hit me. That'll hit, I do not have my major armor up. Even that wouldn't be enough. That is eight points of damage I'm down,

um, max on the diet. Um, okay. And then it is now,

now it's, Damien's turn right. And that's the monster again? Where do I see the monsters? Yeah. Where are they? so you know, that bolts came from generally this direction.

Matt: All right.

Jacob: Oh, and actually you guys can, yeah, you can chat a bit about what you want to do on your turns. Alright. Roll assessable.

Death, save. Yeah, hide. Oh, um, there's some kind of boulders around. over here, there's kind of a Boulder big enough for cover. as well as a couple over here,

Matt: Um, so high death save. And at this moment I have the feeling The best thing I can do, I think at this moment is to, attempt to hide in the darkness and see if I can't avoid further damage dealt towards me. All right. so then I guess I'm going to, just hide because, uh, section high doesn't come until next level, which is so much fun. so I'm going to go ahead and hide. Ouch. I must be hurting cause that's a 12 or herself.

Jacob: All right,

Matt: arrows zips by step into that shower. Those,

Jacob: what was your stealth again? 12.

Where are you hiding?

Matt: Oh, pardon me? Uh, I'm going to attempt to duck over right here next to this Boulder, Kinda like crap, dive back, roll, get behind the Boulder CrossFit out forward.

I don't like being surprised.

Jacob: and then it is going to be their turn again. So they are going to hopefully not kill us.

guek. Can I get a strength or dexterity check from you?

Um, dexterity for sure.

Uh, that's that's still plenty. Um, you are gonna see a goblin come kind of jump at you, Ms. Gage your size. and he's gonna kind of stumble and fall. So can I get,

and then, um, there's going to be one more shot. come at you from, again, generally this direction,

that's going to swing way over your head. there's going to be another, or there's going to be another goblin. Who's going to run out. he's going to position himself right here. He's kind of looking for where, uh, Damian went, but kind of runs out, expecting to find them there. Doesn't really find them.

and at this point, you're going to notice that there is a small little tunnel here, that they're popping out of. So you'll see that, um, that last goblin, is actually like in cover now, inside that tunnel.


Matt: That initiated

Jacob: that. So he is probably like here, he's got a bit of cover from yes. okay. And then it is get stern. well this is over here. How am I supposed to deal with this with my friend down?

Matt: And that he's not dead yet? You can either attempt to stabilize them or you can attack the people that are near him to try and clear some space for him or stabilize him,

Jacob: but to stabilize

Matt: and make a medicine check.

It's your whole action. Unless you have bonus action spells.

Jacob: No, you guys probably wanted take, uh, take out these guys before you try and bring me back. I've got med, I've got saving, I've got saving throws to roll, and statistics

Matt: all the death save yet until he's rolling. These two death saves. He's not in any sort of theoretical danger.

Jacob: Gotcha. Okay. I am going to run away.

So, um, so I'm going to then shoot at this guy. All right. Eldritch Blast. Okay. Whew, wait, you know what, if this guy in particular, so I'm going to hex him first. Okay. Good bonus. Section hex bonus action. Hex. Use my one spell slot and

Matt: I'll pull asked him.

Jacob: Okay, what are your 17? Oh, okay. That will hit roll damage. Yeah. It's only a four damage. Oh eight plus the hacks,

Matt: which is one day for, I think DSX.

Jacob: So five, so four plus five. Oh, engineer's wrath. So two extra damage from that

Matt: four plus five,

Jacob: four plus five plus two is a battle. He's down. Don't those? My friends.

And also don't don't don't you kick? Okay. mirth, that's it. Yeah. I pulled out the one, the dye that was hot, familiar. I'm not going to pull punches anymore. And

Matt: that was the time,

Jacob: that is 16 by the way, success. Okay. now you guys can coordinate a bit of blood splatter.

That's great too. Don't get caught screws. It

Matt: says quietly believing. I just looked back. I may not screw with the dragon. Um, I'm currently hiding, uh, and attempt to,

Jacob: uh, get

Matt: myself a little bit of advantage. I'm not going to give that away by responding to the Duanan.

Jacob: Oh, this is, this is just the, like you guys being coordinating people who have fought with other people before.

yeah, it doesn't happen.

Matt: I'm going to clear the guy who is in, out in the area, of course first, because he is the next closest threat. And then after that, there's only one guy left, which I assume, either yak is going to deal with orchiopexy and attempt to do a medicine check on Monmouth. So pretty, pretty quick and dirty.

Remind me, I'm new to playing rogue. I haven't played Rogan a few years while stealth, do I have an advantage? The attack.

Jacob: So you have advantage on the attack except you can't see anything still.

Matt: I, so do I have to make a perception check to see him or do I have to order? I get disadvantaged from the, uh,

Jacob: council so you can get, um, oh yeah, that's a straight role then.

Yeah. Like, so if you're in complete darkness, you just can't see them. can I get a perception check to see. if you can see the guy out in the open, the other guy, I don't think you'd be able to see at all. Cause he's also like secluded behind cover you'd know he's there from the arrows and stuff, but you wouldn't be able to see him in the dark, not a 10.

if you, if you attack him because you have advantage, I will let that cancel out with the not being able to see him to get to you, make it with this.

Matt: Yeah. In that case, I attack with my crossbow, aiming into the darkness, or I last heard the pitter patter of feet and oh boy, that is a 21

Jacob: disadvantage

Matt: with my advantage.

Plus is disadvantaged making a straight roll. Yeah.

Jacob: Um, you make it with disadvantage cause he's not really visible. So your advantages canceling out, him being invisible entirely and making you think of a disadvantage. If you were to have done something else. That's okay.

Matt: And you're the DMP I follow. I follow what you said.

that is a 13,

Jacob: 13 is going to miss

will sparks. It, hits the wall. are you going to stay there, do something with it? Go on a second.

Matt: I don't really, I'm probably bonus section things to do until I get to second level as a rogue. Really all I'm going to do is basically put my hand on the rock and slide around it a few feet to get closer towards gack living that way.

So I'll

Jacob: move myself. Okay. Real quick. Okay. yeah. And you'd have a pretty good cover there.

Matt: All right. Almost run into oh,

Jacob: Well as monsters, I'm going to go, so he is going to go there and make an attack against GIC.

Does a 19 hits, right? Yes.

So I'm sorry. Does he have disadvantage to, goblin, dark, dark division here. All the natural disadvantage. Definitely stop using that. Okay. Uh, so he is, he's attacking you. that is seven hit points. Jesus, I'm down. All right here, exactly times ya. Okay. so it's been great for being part of this campaign. that is monster. This other one is gonna move up six and he is gonna, you're gonna see that he's grabbing, mirth. He's not attacking mirth. He is just trying to drag Murph and looking like he doesn't have any more movement, but he's preparing to do that.

And then get, can I get a death set?

All the tiny,

Matt: I have an important question to ask. What are your roles? Ken, this goblin see me in the dark,

Jacob: I'm going to have you all for that on your turn. Okay.

cause yeah, so far he did Nazi. If he is, I got a 10, that's a success.

Matt: The success is this your, uh, I forgot to ask, are you relatively new to fifth edition?

Jacob: I'm not new to fifth edition, but I haven't, I don't have a lot of experience. Rolling death saves.

Matt: You've had nice. Got it.

Jacob: Is there any at level one? The fear of God and yet. All right. Um, mirth that save

Oh, no, an eight. All right. One success and one failure. Okay. Damian and others here want to conspire? What are your thoughts? I don't have belts. I'm unconscious. you're if you're hidden, you can try and heal. yuck. I don't know. Do any of us have the ability to heal? Well, you can make a, uh, a

Matt: medicine medicine

Jacob: kit.

medicine medicine check to stabilize them, or probably better to just try and X this guy out. So just, just do it ex. Yeah, just attack. If the other guy's dragging me away, he's not going to be attacking you and you'll have,

Matt: and so probably been moving half movement, which means probably only to get to here.

Jacob: I would try and take the sky goblins, Metta goblins. Typically don't have a whole lot of hit points. You could have a good, if you make a good hit on this gun out with one shot you. So

Matt: what Damien's going to do, he's going to gently set his blood down, leaving it behind this rock. Hopefully you'll get it later.

let's take his cane for where he kinda stuck it in his belt. Try it quietly. Draw the blade, holding the shaft in the other hand. And what I'm going to do is I am going to attack that goblin,

and go for it. since I watched him kill my friend, do I still have a disadvantage on to seeing him since he's in dim

Jacob: light?

Um, no. You're, you're very aware of where he is. You found that from hearing, are you dual wielding at this point? Are you just doing the way I am? Okay, cool.

Matt: Getting ready to kick some butt. And I wrote a 16 on my stealth to maintain myself for sneak attack reasons.

Jacob: Good enough? Yeah. All right.

Matt: So with the 20 on my first attack, I'm going to reach out and smite this goblin with the, with my off hand, with the shaft walking him right across the face.

Jacob: I have a feeling that 20 is going to hit. Yeah. Yeah. Tony heads was that natural 20 or just there before.

Matt: a dirty, alright, alright.

Five points of damage to his face

Jacob: and with the same deck bonus. Yeah. Well, I'll do a lot of damage. He is still, he's still up, but not very long, very hurt looking back and you know,

Matt: 16 to hit for the second blow

Jacob: that will also hit the metal dyes for this one

Matt: seven points of piercing damage. As I used to take the blade, do a nice little one to cross the face and then the blade coming down, seven, him through the neck area, neck clavicle meeting spot.

If I can't.

Jacob: Yeah. Is his head's going to pop right off

Matt: and then with the tiny bit of movement I have, let me take my ruler out. Cause I had to be squared dance, one square to get him

Jacob: I'm on top

Matt: of you. Don't don't freak out. I'm going to have to move 20. Yeah. 25 feet here. I can make it right there. So here's what I'm gonna do. using my ruler moving right there comes screaming out towards where I think mirth spotty, is currently,

Jacob: probably just hit me as you go by clunk.

Matt: Well, since I'm, since my stove has been broken, I'm just going to scream out ly off my Fred's you green pukes and scream out. They come towards.

probably stepping on gas just a little bit in the process of this running stab whack run.

Jacob: Alright, squeeze a little bit more blood out. All right. and then this goblin is going to the survivor.

Yeah, he's okay. He's seeing you right there is going to give up, trying to move a mirth. And he's just going to attack you with his seminar. no max damage, no max damage.

Matt: Well, the seminar

Jacob: man is a 16 to hit.

Matt: It will hit me. Go ahead. And I tried to block it, but I dark and they're short as

Jacob: four points of damage to you? Yes.

Okay. now death saves you just, we get to do it

Matt: together. Yeah. We're all together. Why not save time?

Jacob: 17. Okay. That's one in one piece to success. One failure. One way from success. Three that's one

Matt: and one for you. Sorry.

Jacob: Okay.

All right. You just have

Matt: 10. Just don't get a one to technically

Jacob: one has to fail. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. one would kill either of us off right now.

um, right around me. And then is that because of your rod? Yes, that's my rod.

Matt: is he going to relocate? Is he

Jacob: going to stay right there? No, he stayed right there. great.

Matt: In which case,

Jacob: sorry, I completely forgot. Mirth is, or mirth familiar should still be around and he's not unconscious or dead. So wit the Crow, uh, or rather the Raven who's been just like pining over his master at this point, flaps up in the air and, just tries to distract the goblin, giving, Danny and


Matt: cool. That's why Martha Daniel, our friends, we worked so well together. So great. Since the Crow being with harassing the goblin counts as a

Jacob: ally,

Matt: I'll give you any advantage again. 18 to hit first weapon, I'll roll to hit with a second weapon altogether and see really faster. Uh, the second one is on 11.

I don't think that'll

Jacob: work. Did you do damage

Matt: together? 11 more minutes. Yeah, I thought it'd be faster to roll all the damage together.

Jacob: So,

Matt: the blade is going to do a nine points of piercing damage to this guy's face, but the, the shaft just kind of misses him, which is unfortunate.

Jacob: Uh that's that's. To knock them out.

okay. So they're all

Matt: I missed. Cause his head is his head. Isn't there. All right. I sense they're down unless there's anything, any other creatures immediately going to attack us? I would immediately begin attempting to

Jacob: stabilize mirth. We would have to roll one more death save before you get to. Yeah, I know.

since you guys are out of combat, the threats, well here

Matt: you're the DM, but per rule book, they have to finish the initiative order with death saves.

Jacob: Yeah, you have to do you have, but I am curious what you guys think. Do you, would you rather, give him a role for each one before you guys go cause he finished combat, or just let him roll with advantage. because he's no longer distracted by being in a combat situation. He's just tending to his people, the people for the, um, medicine check. Yeah. Like once you've finished the combat, well, I mean, there's still a certain amount of urgency because we're bleeding out.

So you wouldn't be able to take his time to, uh, like do a very thorough job. So I feel like, I mean, I would like, I would like to have him have advantage, but I think the urgency of the situation would require him to still, I think, work with time with the SL knowing in this situation, knowing these goblins and what, what they want.

you can make a medicine. For each of them before they make their debt. And if you fail, then they'll continue making that saves and you'll make more medical checks.

Matt: Fantastic. So I rolled an 18, four mirth, which should be enough. I think it's 15. Is the stabilization DC,

Jacob: to get suddenly 10. It was like 10.

Yeah, totally fine.

Matt: Maybe it must be my, it must be my hard course. If he stabilizes at zero hit points, he's not dead yet. He's just hurt. Yeah. And

Jacob: Hmm. But not for the 14 for God. Okay, good. Assuming mirth was also helping you. Would've gotten advantage on that too. Oh, I'm still unconscious stabilize, but not conscious.

Matt: So kiosk you're technically a small creature.

Jacob: Yes. Okay. so,

Matt: so first I'm just gonna drag, just now the stabilized GHAC behind this rock and drag mirth behind the rock and go behind the rock myself to give them a chance to, while they're unconscious use their hit dice and come to while I keep tending to their

Jacob: wounds.

Okay. So you're trying to revive, um, So you're, you're basically trying to let them rest and heal up on their own.

Matt: Well, I, well, I stand over them to keep, make sure they're safe now. The very

Jacob: cover. Okay. I like it. if you manage to stabilize, you wake up in 24 hours with one hit point, right.

So I'm

Matt: okay. Simply drag you guys out.

Jacob: Yeah. So you could, you could try to drag him out. I would call this trying to basically rest in a hostile area, where you're keeping watch. So I would, I would let you guys basically take a short rest with, um, and be able to heal with, uh, with your hit dice that way.

I'm pretty sure you can't actually do that with breasts, but I think that's silly.

Matt: so you can do that as I have to, uh, roll

Jacob: watches. Right. But yeah, so basically you can stay here and try to do that and grow watches, or you can try to drag them out. but I'd basically have a roll to see how your watch goes.

just say mechanically, know how that would kind of work. I can't

Matt: see, and I'd have to let it torch, which means I would have zero stealth.

Jacob: what I would do then that'd be kind of a hearing.

Matt: I don't have the strength and Trent, I was strength of nine. I want to do something very Navy, seal ish, and attempt to throw cobalt over my shoulders, grab the Seder by his legs and try and drag them to the stream and then drag them drag, use the screen to help alleviate some of the weight, try and drag both out

was you really could do that with like half carrying

Jacob: a good bit more weight than I think. And it's going to be more of a strength check. Um, just more to see like how quickly you can do it and how gracefully fully you can do it. Um, I rolled a five, so I'm making lots of noise. Okay. So yeah, you're definitely moving slow.

and then can I get a stealth check as well?

Matt: Doctor that was sweet. Niblets a stoke check, uh, 13,

Jacob: All right. that, you know, so you can see that way up in the city. People have heard this commotion, you know, they can't really see it's complete knowns lid, any torches yet. So it's completely dark where they're looking, but they've heard a bit of splashing.

They've heard, they've heard combat, so you can see that people are creatures up in the, planks are starting to move around. and there's, kind of, you can see particularly one platform that is kind of listing with weight of, and footsteps on it as people are kind of being loaded onto it.

but it's not being lowered yet. If I can see it yeah. Up there, you can see it. So that would have

Matt: the rocks. I see what I collected my crossbow. Yeah. If I can see it, would I have the chance to take a aimed shot at the rope and attempt to fray it, causing them to drop into the chasm below? Yes, I would totally do that.

Jacob: Yeah. So the rope, the rope is lit well enough, you know, there's torches around up there. totally lit well enough that you can see exactly where it is

Matt: the roadway. That's what's going to say how far away is this because, um, crossbow is their effective range is 80, but our maximum range is 320.

What'd you rule that out of range in your out what ADP, like,

Jacob: um,

Matt: you're at, you're an engineer. Um, if you sneak

Jacob: up a bit, maybe to like here, you would have, you would be able to see with the Navy feet of it. Okay. So they won't be able to do it. Like,

Matt: that's assume I've drug them here by the time I realize what's going on.

Jacob: And then I run up to

Matt: make the shot

Jacob: one crossword bolt. That's not, I

Matt: don't know if he'll do it because that's a 10 target,

Jacob: small target, um, that that's not going to do it for the, or the cable.

then, then seeing that though, uh, it will slow them down a bit. You'll notice that people kind of like duck a bit and kind of wait to see if you're shooting more before, um, continuing to like get people over that.

Matt: Right. Hang it back over my shoulder. You're also one dragon born. I know it's not dragon born, but that's my character.

Can't figure it out. The difference. Wonder I go mourn over his shoulder once the Seder in the hand and started trying to desperately trudge for the surface,

Jacob: right? Yeah. Is like six foot seven. He's a big boy. I

Matt: told you. I'm

Jacob: dragging you. Yeah. Yeah. Um, okay. So yeah, you're dragging him forward. Can I get another step, a strength check.

It's an eight. Um, so 11, if it kept matters. Yeah. I mean they know you're down there. Um, so they are gonna let me roll for them. use the dye. That's not rolling. That can roll below 10,

10 speak of the devil. Okay. So they are gonna throw a torch down. and you're going to be successfully out of the light range of it. So there's a torch kind of on the ground here that they tossed down to try to get eyes on you. but the dim lights, you're just outside of the dim light, kind of range of it.

So you're still completely in the dark.

Cool. So then you can, um, can you make one more strength for me?

Nine, not strong dude,

Matt: uh, swift a

Jacob: foot. Okay. Um, so you're gonna,

Matt: you're gonna get cussing just the whole time.

Jacob: You're gonna get just into the mouth of the cave here. And they're gonna, you're going to see them kind of starting to lower that platform down, at this point you're in the stream. and you can kind of get some assistance from that, there,

Matt: uh,

Jacob: as you're, as you're able to move down, especially the sounds of the stream, you'll see that they don't really appear to have any idea where you've gone at this point.

they, again, they, they do their torch, but you weren't there, they're kind of looking around where that is. you guys successfully kind of get out of that tunnel, without the seaside. Yeah. So, you know, you can stop at that buzzing sound if you want. but I'm assuming you're going to be kind of trying to get straight into, back to the beach.

I'm I'm hauling for the surface at this point. All right.

Matt: get out to the sunlight, like a, bless it. Sunlight. Remind me not to go into ground again, please come on. Okay. Trying to drag them up towards the nearest person. Who's technically the race coordinator off screen.

Jacob: All right. so yeah, you guys, you guys are back at the beach now.

and so yeah, you've pulled out your friends onto the beach. there's parties kind of going on you're at the edge of it. So people don't immediately notice that, you know, your friends kinda need help, so, Danny. And what are you doing? as a

Matt: drag them up? giving me a go ahead.

Oh, I, I said, ah, no, which have you had yet? Didn't notice the goblin horde underneath your town, but I might need a bit of help. I've got two wounded and a lot of anger at probably a bit of a hangover. Now, two things healing for these two and people that like to kill things to go and deal with that

Jacob: they'll get in the door.

Yeah. So those, those doors that you're hanging out with, they'll see, you they'll recognize you they'll see that your, buddies are down,

Matt: bleeding down. What are you

Jacob: doing? Going into random cases?

Matt: Of course. Where do you think the goblins are going to live? I didn't think they'd live right inside of a city on the beach and think a regatta would be happening just a Stone's throw from their entrance into the abyss below.

Now you don't happen to have access to any sort of clerical skills do you? Because this dragon born here is quite seriously injured.

Jacob: Getting a cleric over here is going to take time, but cricket, cricket out of ale to get you something, something nice pretty quick. alright. Can you, can you go get cricket?

the guy at the, at the, uh, bar over there, um, and he'll send a dwarf off to go, grab cricket, the bartender, you guys. Um, bartender. Yeah. He's, he's gonna come over. He's gonna, mix up a bit of, uh, healing,

Matt: wake up juice,

Jacob: basically. so can I get a concept from the two of you? See it's pouring Milky

now then that 20 comes out could have used that to just saves the go

Matt: question at this point is our Kobold oh, disease is covered blown as he is unconscious and draped across my shoulders or being tossed our table at this point.

Jacob: Cover as a Kobold.

Matt: yeah, I mean, I wasn't

Jacob: really trying to, yeah. Yeah. The, you know, the monstrous races aren't particularly, you know, appreciated in town.

but they are, present, you kind of missed that in the, sessions zero, but, okay. I just wanted to double check in the, especially in the big cities, you know, if you're in a small town, people might have a bit more credited for Dejah.

Matt: we've been talking about let's take care of this cobalt and all that. Daniel is going to be insisting the whole time. He's a miniature dragon porn is very rare. Can't you tell, I mean, surely one of your, of your Steve would know this. I mean, look at him.

Jacob: Jack's having dreams of like being a dragon and like flying and let him having a hoard and stuff.

That's that little bit of, uh, The route that you ate, uh, kicking in, you know, now that you're conscious, you're really, you're really feeling that again. Um, did you guys make your concepts? All right. You guys got it? Plus I got a dirty 21. All right. Perfect. He has a fine, okay, so you guys come to on, let me roll you guys, or can you guys each role?

one, the four class one that helps you.

Fantastic. three plus one. So, four. Perfect. Okay. So you guys have the task now from these, cocktails made you ouch. Oh, why don't you guys do,

but that was really good.

Matt: You're helping to watch the ricotta. Of course, curiosity began to kill the Elba as we wandered in and started following some strange noises. And next thing we know these two are bleeding on the ground and it's fallen to me yet again, to prevent them from being taken into deaths, clutches.

Jacob: what happened? I remember us in the cavern. I was saying hello to the town underneath the ground. And then all of a sudden I felt something ouchy, uh,

Matt: to be short, you did what you usually do,

Jacob: entertain everyone and make them happy.

Matt: Get yourself into trouble.

Jacob: Oh, that does happen from time to time.

Matt: at least you don't die every time you get into trouble, it could be very annoying.

Jacob: well at least then we have this very strong and burly man to carry us out of the cave.

Matt: Don't you patronize me not on my anniversary.

Jacob: Um, I think patronizing you is good anytime anniversary or not, but thank you for not letting us die.

Matt: You know, all I could think of is what would my wife think of me? If I left you to die,

Jacob: you have a wealth I've never learned,

Matt: oh, you don't have the story.

Jacob: I love

Matt: star wars.

Jacob: So it will be a bit of a headache. Can we talk about this later? I

Matt: literally have.

So I was once the sign of, of an Elvin house adopted as a favor to my, my father. I married a beautiful oven Mae maiden named Bryron, fantastic eyes like the sea and head like that would have an Oak tree. So beautiful anyways. Um, the problem was is that, um, unfortunately my brother-in-law adoptive brother-in-law, was not a particularly good salt.

He decided that it was a good idea to mock my wife saying that the only reason she would marry a human was due to some, um, premarital indiscretions, if you will, which was not true. I'm an honorable man fight what I do to people on occasion and, uh, well, After a series of insults or sad, couldn't take it anymore.

And I had to unfortunately close his hideous mouth permanently with a blade,

Jacob: close something with a blown. What sounds like something that will open the mouth.

Matt: Oh, you see what you do is you plug the hole with a blade and then you blade there.

Jacob: I take a dagger and I opened my mouth and I show them that I can still put a dagger in my mouth and still talk.

Matt: It doesn't work that way for ELLs. Anyhow, he dies. I took that ring. This ring short, my signet ring on my left hand, took this ring from him as a souvenir. Unfortunately, my hardheadedness earned me a banishment, because it was technically a duel and not an outright murder. I was not executed, but suffice to say, I haven't seen my wife in four years.

Uh, I'm just trying to find a home for us. Really. This is where my

Jacob: wife bought house truths for her.

Matt: Yes.

Jacob: And that's all I, and wit now flies down, lands on a Duanan shoulder and starts making crying,

just kind of mocking him and, uh, being a pest,

Matt: gently, knock them off my shoulder with I cane.

Jacob: They start picking at your skills, getting a little bit of a, like a gunk coat from underneath them and kind of preening you

scratching away.

Matt: The third can be a bit of a nuisance and a bit of help at times. I don't know how to feel about it a little bit. Like, I don't know how to feel about mirth at times, but.

Jacob: Can I speak now

Matt: you may speak, just remember it's my anniversary, please. Don't say something stupid involving my wife, run

Jacob: a beach or something stupid involving your wife. Okay. Can I find a con can I find like a conch shell and hand it to her?

Yeah. Yeah. It shouldn't be,

that has a sound to it. And he starts playing a little tune on it.

Like survivor,

Matt: has it been cut to be a horn yet? So that was just basically, cause

Jacob: just making a sputtering.

Matt: I don't know about you, but I need to sleep. And honestly, I'm starting to give you a hangover from that. We are ginger.

Jacob: the, um, T flooding that gave you guys that we, ginger, is gonna kind of see you guys slumped over on the ground. it's, it's getting a bit later, you know, it's like five o'clock or something. getting maybe like six, the sun's starting to kinda make the water look all pretty and she's gonna come over way.

Like, oh, you guys, just to, I was looking for, you know, I've, you know, I've been sitting here and gosh, this festival has been fantastic. I'm glad you guys could come, but I was hoping I could get some help from some tough guys. Like you, I had to tell you took on those, frightened with that door. If you got some good moves and what, what, what happened here?

Matt: Goblins happens. And honestly, I don't want to talk about it. What do you need for that? Oh,

Jacob: good. You guys are frightened goblins. That's good. Great, exactly, exactly what I'm looking for. don't make me go

Matt: underground again. Not, not twice a day. So

Jacob: me, me and a couple of friends where, uh, you know, that you guys know about the refineries down over there, right?

what are you talking about?

Matt: Wait, wait, yonder, cross the river.

Jacob: there's these refineries from the rich folk, they keep, pollutant the water and it's just, it's just not right. It's not natural. And you know, on this wonderful solstice, we were thinking of breaking into there and messing with the place you guys in.

Matt: I mean, that does sound exciting and we'll go tomorrow. I was going to sleep. It's gotta

Jacob: be tonight, but once it, once it gets dark, he all you guys will be fine and you guys will be fine. Sounds doable. A few more drinks on drinks there. I know what you're looking for. She'll give you some more, uh, uh, pull out the route and she'll she like shaves it and licks it kind of like a, the like mints that dissolve in.

So I stick it on her time. all right. And I think on that note, we will call it a night.

Thank you everyone for listening to the tale on told and as always, uh, if you like what you hear, go get yourself a player's handbook, a dungeon masters guide, or just a starter kit, and go play with your friends constantly and dragons as best with friends.

Goodnight, everyone. Goodnight and hi

Matt: everybody. Thank you for stealing my a sign-out.

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